... Bob's Fabricated Interview
This week Bob visits with Saddam Hussein
| Bob: | Thank you for allowing me this interview. Before we get started I wanted to be clear that you do indeed have mastery of the English language, is that correct? | |
| Saddam: | Yes | |
| Bob: | OK, Well let me just throw a couple of tests at you to be clear on that. Do you know the letter of our alphabet that comes between h and j? | |
| Saddam: | I | |
| Bob: | Great. Now, can you tell me what the present tense counterpart of the word had is? | |
| Saddam: | Have | |
| Bob: | Well I really appreciate your bearing with me there. It certainly appears clear that our language has not escaped you. Let's get started. What exactly are the U.N. inspectors looking for? | |
| Saddam: | Weapons of mass destruction. | |
| Bob: | So you admit it. | |
| Saddam: | Admit what? | |
| Bob: | So far you've said "Yes I have weapons of mass destruction". | |
| Saddam: | You are much more clever than Mr. Rather. So you got me, now what? | |
| Bob: | Just put them away. You could poke an eye out with those things. Let's move on to more important issues. What do you think of the Yankees chances this year? | |
| Saddam: | They will be living proof that money can buy happiness. | |
| Bob: | What's your biggest complaint about living in Iraq? | |
| Saddam: | It costs a fortune to heat the palace. | |
| Bob: | What's your favorite book, and why? | |
| Saddam: | "Little Women", I just like the title. | |
| Bob: | Do you have anything else you'd like to say to the Speechbooster browsers? | |
| Saddam: | Please don't tell anyone about what I said regarding that weapons of mass destruction thing. Let's keep it our little secret. | |
| Bob: | So there you have it. Tune in next week for an interview with Khalid Shaikh Mohammed, voted really not nice guy of the year. | |
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